Tales of a Maintenance Man #67

The mighty hunters gather around, bewildered and awe struck -
Staring at the autonomous beast before them, trying to awaken the colossus from his slumber.
Confusion sets in, ideas thrown around - What is it waiting for? What does it need?
They pickup the handheld HMI and a try to decipher the text before them,
A consensus is thus formed that they, no it! May need a higher being
to command it to come to life, and provide them their daily provisions.
Some say a offering of goods,
The extremists say a ritual sacrifice,
The liberals want to pull the plug and raise the taxes -

NAY! To all of you I say:
"Do not panic, your chieftain has arrived!"
I unlatch the door to the metal enclosure the locals have surrounded it,
And I point out those closest to me the crudely made sign telling them to:
"Get back! Danger may befall upon to all yee who enter here"
I step in and a rush of air expels around me and I yell to the one armed beast "EASY BIG FELLA!"
Slowly I approach it one step, then another before carefully stretching out my hand -
Like one extends a hand to a stray dog,
And carefully pull the contracted bright red estop
Before I slink back the path I came in on
and seal the secured prison door
then push reset.

Nothing more
nothing less.

Tales of A Maintenance Man #22

Trapped behind this desk I sit,

The weight of boredom hangs heavy upon my brow,

My eyes drift amongst the sea of black and white lines on the monitor before me,

Obscuring my thoughts on the task at hand.

I have been down this road before - I think.

Or am I thinking about a previous time, about this very exact thing?

When did consciousness and unconsciousness blend into this reality before me?

The 100mg of caffeine guarantees my alertness,

Although I find myself being pulled out of my chair towards the flashing amber lights that are rotating towards me....

HONK! HONK! HONK!

I pretend I didn't see him and continue to walk BUT twice as slow,

Only to hear the short vested man pushing the horn button with the force of 12 angry gorillas.

HONK! HONK! HONK!

He gestures me to move to the left. I gesture him where to shove it.

He drives by mumbling and cursing, I get written up for expressing myself in a unsafe manner.

I'm written up immediately for the second time for telling them to eat a bag of dicks -

and sent home without pay.

Ah…back to reality.

Tales of A Maintenance Man #258

So I thought today was gonna be like any other day,

Fix some machines, eat some food, fix more machines, and go home.

Yes, today did start like any other, but wait, what’s this?

A call to the ace room?

Nay I say, the machines up there run like a doozy.

Aie, there was But one machine that did not.

Cryptic she be too the operators that swarmed like

Moths attracted to a flame.

What is this mysterious spell that has fallen upon #4?

We have not seen this before, maybe on goats but not this?

Have their eyes deceived them?

Was it Voodoo?

Alas! It was a box.

A mighty fine beast she was and mustered up a good fight,

But in the end it was just a box.

Nothing more.